इंतज़ार की दस्तक

तेरी याद मे ना दिन कटते हैं ना रातें गुज़रती हैं

तुझसे दो घड़ी बातें करने को हर साँस तड़पती है।

अक्सर सूजी रहती हैं आँखें भी अब मेरी

झूठ बोलने ही नहीं देती हैं ये गीली गिलाफ़े भी मेरी।

सपने में बुनती हूं ख्वाब एक हसीन

देखा था सदियों पहले और चाहा था वही।

आँख खुली तो पाया एक अंधेरा सा यहीं

था पेहरेदार एक नया पर जज़्बा फिर वही।

समझने समझाने को तो साकी हज़ार बैठे हैं

तुम आने की दस्तक तो दो मेरे हमदम

हम एक जनम से पलके बिछाए तेरे ही दीदार के लिए बैठे हैं ।।


परियों का गुलिस्तान

लोग कहते हैं पापा की पारियां,
आसमाँ से उतर के बेटियां बन के आती हैं …..

कोई पूछो उन पारियों से भी ज़रा,
आंगन से निकल के उड़ जाने में किस क़दर उनकी जान जाती है…..

एक वक़्त था जब चोट लगती थी उन्हे,
आह निकलने से पहले प्यार की सीख मिलती थी उन्हे……

उस दर्द की दवा एक प्यारी मुस्कान भर होती थी,
माँ पापा की वो फिकर एक मलहम सा होती थी ….

अब चोट लगती है दिलों पे और घाव भी कुछ गेहरा सा हो जाता है ,
ना आंसू निकलते हैं ना ही खून गिरने का पता चलता है ……

हम सब पारियों की एक अनजानी अनोखी एक समान ही ये कहानी है ,
ना जाने सदियाँ कितनी हैं बीती ना जाने कितनी और बीत जानी हैं.. …

खुश हैं हम इस जहाँ मे भी ना कोई गिला ना कोई शिकायत है ,
बस ये दिल किसी पे आया hait और साथ उसका ही निभाना है ….

बूझा एक सवाल बेटियों से जब खुदा ने,
क्या चाहता है तेरा दिल के बन के रहे तू ख्वाबों की रानी या पारियों की रानी. …

एक मासूम सा जवाब आया जेसे हो रूह की निशानी ,

ना बनना मै चाहूँ रूप की गुड़िया ना ही पारियों की रानी ,
ना चाहूँ बनना ख्वाबों की मलिका ना महलों की रानी …

मै तो बस चाहूं एक नंन्हा सा घरौंदा ,
फूल हो जो गुलशन का और हो यादें पुरानी …

ना राजा हो तुम ना ही रानी मै बनूँ ,

बस तुम मेरे रहो और मै तुम्हारी यू रहूँ ,
बगिया हो अपनो की और आंचल मेरे बाबुल का ,
ना दूर हो माँ बाबा ना हो प्यार नज़र से खफा ,
एक ही घर मे हो मेरा एक छोटा सा गुलिस्तान . …….


May 9, 2018

Khubsurat chaandni

Ishq k lahu se chamakti ae chaandni shaam,

Na jaane kitne us chaand se mukhatib hone ko bekaraar hain…

Dil thaam k baithein hain ek khat k intezaar me,

Na maloom hai unhe, bheje kitne lawj-e-paigaam hain…

Ek nazar jo hum par pad jaaye toh roshan hai zindgaani,

Raah takne me na jaye fir ye bezaar jawaani….

Husn wo nahi jo roshan hai zamaane ki duhaayi se,

Khubsurti bayaan karne ki zarurat nahi jab roshni milti hai aapki duaaon se….


What does “Death” seek?

Often I write a lot by hiding myself in a corner where I spill my thoughts and express myself. This one is for the world at large to peep into what shook me enough to the core once again.

Death, an inevitable truth of life. A fact even before life begins for humans, animals and plants. Life is a complete circle just because death exists. A vicious circle that keeps this universe going in its own mystrical ways. How ironical it is that we feel we can control everything in this world where the basics that are out of our control are, Life and Death.

Today it surprises me to the core, how I never had a chance to think about my birth yet not just once but many times I must have spared a thought about Death. A phenomenon that has its own plans. For some wait and pray for it to arrive where others are snatched by it in a blink of eye. I am curious about this “Life” and “Death” for how little it has an impact on the bearer…. as compared to what it is for the family and friends. Arrival of a new life makes the poorest household bloom with jewels of love & care; whereas, death is a curse for the wisest and purest kingdoms of the land.

Do I fear it? I don’t know. Do I dread it? I don’t know. Then what do I really think about death? Why do I even think about it all or get affected?

May be because death of some closed ones taught me how it changes life of family and friends. We learn to live with a mind that is cluttered and busy with thoughts and yet there is vaccum within it. The silence within the heart hides a loud cry that ecoes forever like a shreak that cannot be faded with time. And it is not only me, we all at some point or other think about death in a way… yet there is no answer enough about what will happen to people who we would leave behind!

As always the thoughts dive wondering, with the sublime attachment & detachment; what is it that Death seeks?

The recent news of Bollywood actor Sridevi forced me to think about this not so happy fact. Despite my efforts, I could not ignore the buzz all around. Sitting here in a corner untouched from my soil, it still seemed inpossible to sync in with the way the events shaped up. A woman, a daughter, a wife, a mother, a talented actor and so much more she was. I grew up seeing her movies and admiring her for her beauty and talent on screen. It was a shocking moment when a friend texted me early in the morning informing about her sad and sudden demise. From that moment, a strange sadness lingered around me through the entire day. Just last week, while exploring YouTube, I had seen a video where media showcased a random conversation between Sri (as people lovingly referred her) and her daughter in a sensational manner; “Sridevi shouts at daughter Jhanvi publicly”. I remember seeing the video thinking what crap is this, the mother & daughter just had a conversation and media is selling it with a stupid tag line. Casually I just moved on without even realising that this is not the end of it. It’s just the beginning of a nightmare…..

In the last few days, these incidents did take up some space in my thoughts.

Indeed the obvious question is, Why? Was Sridevi anyone close to me? Definitely not. She was no one to me. Not relevant in any manner. For me, she was just an actor I used to like and respect for her talent and work. But then there are many names in that list, actors, authors, artists, sportsperson, scientist, politicians, businessmen and so on. I’m a middle class girl next door who sees work of these talented, hard working people and appreciate the same. Then why did this impact me so much? Famous people die every now and then and so does a common man.

A simple answer could be that I was over thinking, well to be frank I did not think at all until the media forced me to. Yes, it is a loss to the nation and bollywood industry but not as much as to the family. A famous person’s death is a sad as a common man’s if not more. The family feels the pain equally. This lady Sri leaves behind 2 young adolescent daughters and a husband grieving. Were they prepared for it just because they were star kids…. NO! Can they handle it better then a middle class child….. NO! Is it easier for them to live life without their mother.. their wife.. their relative Sridevi. … NO! Is it easy for rich to move on…. NO!

Definitely a NO….. …… when someone dies, the grief cannot be compared or measured irrespective of what the cause of death was. Yes, some reasons are rather horrible and torturous than casual death, yet the shock is as harsh to bear as anything.

The Indian media left no stone unturned for 48 hours to rape Sridevi’s personal life without realising that a family lost someone they loved. They were so busy finding the commercial reason of death that they forgot everything about the feelings of her family members. Drugs, wine, drinking, affair, marital dispute and what not……. every possible assumption to make the news spicy. Why is it so difficult that she may have just died because of heart stroke and she was happy in her own world with her family? Why….??

All this and no one thinks about giving space to a family who wants to cry, mourn and shed tears for some time in silence. The limelight of their life has gone away and thus they want to have peace with each other rather than facing the media limelight.

When a person is alive, they seek name, fame, limelight, leisure, pleasure and all the materials. But Death…… death is silent. Death seeks nothing but just peace. Let people die in peace atlst, the world is not anymore the best place to live happily amidst the so called evolved humans.

It is life that is about drama and light. Death just seeks peace!

Ek Yaad …..

Ek chote se dil ki hai ek choti si yaad;

Na mar sakte hain tumpe na honge kurbaan;
Naraazgi kam ho jaaye toh ek ishaara bhar karna;
Keh denge tumko apni masoom si fariyaad….

Dastoor he kuch ajeeb hai, Kisi ki kami kyun thehraau;
Na rishtaa koi tumse Na koi naam jo batlaau;
Kasoor bas yahi hai iss nadaan mere dil ka;
Mohabbat kar Li hai tumse, Ab kya iss dastaan ko jhutlaau….

Duniya ki iss bheed mein aksar yahi hota hai;
Jeevan k iss ghere me bas dil he fanna hota hai;
Ku har ek shaqs ke dil pe jakhm ek gehra sa hota hai;
Kuki shayad har ek ka dil kisi aur k seene mein bhi dhadakta hai……….

मैं हूँ 

किसी रोज़ बारिश जो आये समझ लेना बुन्दों में मैं हूँ..

बादल जो गरजने लगे तो समझ लेना आहटों में मैं हूँ..

जो छू जायें बूंदे कभी तो समझ लेना एहसासों में मैं हूँ..

सरसराहट जो महसूस हो तो समझ लेना हरकतों में मैं हूँ……

कमी जो रह जाये फिर भी कहीं तो..

ना जज़्बात हमारे काबिल लगे तो..

बिन मौसम की बारिश के बादल की तडपन..

इनं सभी से शिकायत होने लगे तो..

समझ लेना रूह की गेहरायी में मैं हूँ ………

A Father who is an amazing Daddy too!

Every emotion has been for mum, only to realise you yourself are my emotional self.

All the affection for mum, silence for dad

All the feelings for mum, arguments for dad

All the concern for mum, worries for dad

All the discussions for mum, only questions for dad

All the positive vibes for mum, only distance for dad

All the care for mum, only anger for dad

All the cuddles for mum, only glances for dad..
I know you were strict, but to make me confident

I know you were rude, but only to make me realize

I know you had your views, but respected mine

I know you had to restrict, but you chose freedom

I know you wanted me to stay, yet you gave me wings

I know you wanted me to be safe, but allowed me to fly
You scold enough to make me understand,

Tease enough to make me blush,

Love enough to forgive every mistake,

Care enough to read my face,

Support enough that I sail through,

Teach enough that I don’t forget..
You are the best daddy in the world, not because you are who you are…… But because you allowed me to be who I am & presented it proudly in front of the world.

You say am your honor but with time I realized am honored to be your only Darling Daughter!!! :* :*
❤ Proud to be King Daddy’s Princess ❤

🙂  Happy Wala Father’s Day